GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
Randomize
