There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize