you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
I don't want my vagina anymore.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
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