do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
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