just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
We're not piercing ourselves today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
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