Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
Non-Jews are for practice
Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
Randomize
