Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
50% drunk capacity currently
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
Randomize
