My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
Randomize