I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
yea but for you.
I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
A woman with Alzheimer's pointed at me and said, "Don't forget to wear socks, because you're a lady!" I think it's legit advice.
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.