Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
And then my night got REAL pukey
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
He couldn't undo my bra. He ended up breaking the clasp he clawed at it so long. We met on Tinder for God sake
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Randomize
