don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
Randomize
