What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
This is the high leading the old right now
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
Randomize
