Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
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