If i come over, it means nothing
life lesson #1: a fart during an awkward silence between 2 strangers doesnt make it less awkward.
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
Randomize