He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
I hooked up with a Michael Jackson impersonator last night. Too soon?
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
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