I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
