3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
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