thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
Well I just put wine in my tea
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
Randomize
