Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
I just typed "I've got a friend" and my phone autocompletes to "that's a dick appointment". What is my life.
Randomize
