she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Randomize
