I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
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