Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
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