I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
Randomize
