Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
