ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
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