Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
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