She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
So I have the hangover from hell, spent all night puking, and there's a septic tank truck parked outside the house literally pumping shit. You win God.
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
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