Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Randomize
