Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
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