I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
Just Everbombed a Guiness to make up for cutting out early last night. Also the Mars probe. Happy birthday motherfucker!
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
