these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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