So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
Randomize
