no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
