No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
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