I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
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