Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
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