Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
Randomize
