Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
Randomize
