I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
So many bounce houses so little time
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
Randomize
