i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
she walked up to me at the bar, kissed me, andthen declared "I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU OR YOUR PENIS SINCE 2011."
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
Randomize