maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
