Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
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