He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
I won't apologize to a one balled man
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
Randomize
