i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
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