So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
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