I changed my tire completely alone.. I could totally win survivor
Its my greatest physical accomplishment
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
Randomize