forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
I feel like abortions should bother me more
I intend to get homeless drunk
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Randomize