So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize