yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
He's on the porch naked. Help.
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
