would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
Last night when I was hammered I set a reminder to tell you that your boobs are my favorite ones in the world, so this is me giving you that message.
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
My breasts were aching with rage.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize
