Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
